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Writer's pictureHubert Saint-Onge

If You Aspire To Be A Great Leader, Be Present

By Hubert Saint-Onge



Let me open this topic with a true anecdote illustrating what this is all about.  Many years ago, my office was in a large hall where all the executives had closed-in offices with big oak doors reminiscent of Middle Age fortifications.  I was the newbie in this group with all sorts of ideas on leadership and organizations. Occasionally, I got to the office unreasonably early to get a head start on a busy day. On one of those days, only two of us were in the place: my more senior next-door neighbour and I.  When my computer pinged unexpectedly, I noticed he had just sent me a long email about a complex issue. There was a look of horror on his face when I walked to his office with the intent to discuss possible solutions. Although he was a high-integrity, knowledgeable and thoughtful leader, my colleague was well-anchored at the far end of the leadership presence spectrum.  Unfortunately, it limited his impact in the organization.


This article is a guide to help leaders transform their presence from ordinary to extraordinary. Each section begins with a set of questions designed to evaluate your leadership presence. I hope the insights provided will empower you to enhance your leadership presence and inspire those around you.


How do we define presence in a leader?


Leadership presence can be understood as the ability to command a room and communicate ideas and opinions with confidence, poise, persuasiveness, and impact to various audiences. It's about how you talk and listen, how you present yourself, and how you connect with people. But it's not just about the surface level. It also goes deeper, to the core of a leader’s role, and is highly intuitive and more difficult to define: it ultimately boils down to building meaningful connections with people and consistently inspiring them. Leaders who master this second dimension create commitment and authentic energy. This second dimension of leadership presence is the focus of this article.


Leadership presence is not just about projecting a confident and inspiring image to others. It's also about being self-aware and clear about your own values, principles, and beliefs. This internal clarity allows leaders to express their purpose with meaning, energy, emotional courage, and commitment. It's about integrating the inside-out and outside-in perspectives, and this self-awareness is the foundation for exercising high-integrity adaptive leadership.  


Leaders who aim to bring effective presence to their role must also have the mental agility to connect what they absorb from the ‘outside-in’ perspective to their inner convictions and narratives. Integrating the inside-out and outside-in perspectives becomes a critical foundation for exercising high-integrity adaptive leadership. A misalignment creates internal and external pressure points that affect authenticity. People have a strong affinity and trust in leaders who voice their principles confidently and consistently, while a lack of consistency undermines credibility, trust and likeability.  


Leaders reading about the depth of this work related to presence depth might find it is not worth the effort. However, recent research by Joe Folkman at Zenger Folkman demonstrates how meaningful the results might be for leadership effectiveness: In a study of 51,836 leaders, only 27 were rated both in the bottom quartile in terms of likability and the top quartile in terms of overall leadership effectiveness—in other words, the chances that a manager who is intensely disliked will be considered a good leader are only about one in 2,000. Leaders who insist on leading from a distance based on their competence or authority pay a heavy price.  


Having an internally driven narrative that animates leaders from within cannot only become the inner voice reinforcing beliefs, commitments and mindsets. Still, it can also trigger their self-development, an essential element of their leadership mastery. With self-reflection and feedback from trusted colleagues, this work gives leaders the basis for creating a meaningful developmental plan and eventually generating the confidence to take an authentic leadership openly stand that will confirm them as effective and influential leaders. If leaders can genuinely embody a meaningful leadership commitment, they will come across as genuine and compelling: they will project robust and trusted leadership for people.


The critical components of leadership presence


The outline of each thematic element starts with a series of questions that guide the reader in assessing their related leadership practice. Each question represents an activity or behaviour that fosters leadership presence. The answers to these questions can be the basis for formulating a development plan.


The second part of these components outlines a scenario where many of these activities are applied to archetypal situations facing leaders.  


Connecting with people 


To what extent…

1.         … do I make it a point of connecting with people when I see them?

2.         … do I focus my full attention on people when I interact with them?

3.         … do I consistently listen to people with openness?

4.         … do I come across with a balance of warmth, confidence and strength?

5.         … do I remain calm, kind and focused despite the intensity of the context?

6.         … do I connect well with others even when resolving challenging situations?

7.         … are people open and straightforward in disagreeing with me?

8.         … do people believe they can sort out difficult issues with me?


Connections are fundamental to leadership effectiveness. People need to be included and to feel a sense of belonging. Present leaders form authentic connections by being attentive and building genuine relationships based on trust and respect.  It has much to do with how they show up. As innocuous as it might appear, a meaningful part of leadership presence is acknowledging the people around you at all levels.  It allows the leader to ask how team members are doing: How are you holding up with all the work? Do you need support? It is as simple as being kind, warm and generous with people. This will allow the present leader to read the mood, understand underlying emotions and surface them. For instance, when resolving challenging situations, a present leader might acknowledge the difficulty of the situation, express empathy, and then guide the team toward a solution.


Strong connections will enable leaders to express their own emotions constructively. They will be able to work through issues with emotional courage. The trust they build with their attention, energy, and commitment will give them the space to address obstacles and issues in their organization. They will be able to be direct and upfront without alienating anyone’s support.  


We have all witnessed goal-keeping leaders stay behind their desks, tending to incoming messages as though it is all that matters. They rarely come out of their offices for fear of having to deal with someone in person. In rows of internal offices, they make the odd foray to the coffee station, looking so pressed that most but the most courageous avoid addressing them. They stay away from the messiness of being in contact with most people.  This represents a polar opposite description of the present leader, but these behaviours are not unfamiliar to most of us. Essentially, they cut themselves off from those around them for fear of squandering their precious time while missing an accurate read of their organizational environment, a core leadership responsibility and key to these leaders’ effectiveness.   


Connecting with people at a genuine level opens the door to coaching and influencing them. The ability to give full attention to people and to listen to them is fundamental to the present leader.  Spreading your attention or multi-tasking when engaging with others is counter-productive:  it will only create difficulty down the road. Of course, there are different levels of listening. We must silence our inner voices or mental chatter to listen intently and engage with others truly. The simple act of leaders staying laser-focused in their interactions will significantly impact the strength of their connections. They will have achieved this when people walk away from an interaction with the reaction that it was terrific to have a conversation with someone when it felt like nothing else mattered.


Being attuned to the context, others and yourself


To what extent…

1.         … do I detect when others need support and provide it to them? 

2.         … do I connect to the emotions in a discussion and acknowledge my own?  

3.         … do I create relationships I can count on?

4.         … do I consistently demonstrate that I care about others?

5.         … do I ask for feedback from others?

6.         … do I communicate openly and honestly?

7.         … do you see what is going on around me?

8.         … am I clear about my values and committed to stand up when they are contradicted?

9.          … do I create context for people by making meaning in the face of uncertainty?


Strong presence starts with managing ourselves. In my previous blog on self-awareness, I described the need to maintain internal and external awareness: the ability to understand one’s emotions and those of others. When a context becomes more fractious, these two dimensions become closely connected and affect one another. This is often when we are unaware of the impact of messages we send unwittingly.

To retain self-awareness under pressure, pausing to get clarity about the emotions leaders experience under challenging conditions is essential. This self-awareness will help them better understand what is happening with everyone involved. This is why it is critical to stay in sufficient balance to remain self-aware, resilient, adaptive, and perceived as trustworthy to deal effectively with what is happening. Being self-aware supports one’s resilience and helps create positive interactions.  


A more difficult challenge arises when a leader's resilience shows cracks that are perceivable by others. It often becomes contagious horizontally across the leadership team and vertically across the layers of the organization. There is usually an asymmetry where people can see accurately what is happening while the leader remains aloof from the dynamics involved. People readily see when a leader becomes defensive and does not appear on top of what is happening. This propensity can create a perceivable distance between leaders and team members. It is easy to start going in a spiral without first seeing it happen. The contrary occurs when a leader stays in touch, remains positive, and is hopeful that issues will get resolved. Leaders with presence build trust-based relationships that allow them to stay attuned to what people are experiencing. People want to feel more connected to their leaders when things are difficult. They need to trust them, and, maybe more importantly, in this situation, they need to feel trusted by you. However, people tend to be close to someone who has remained distant and does not connect with them sufficiently to demonstrate trustworthiness.


The leader who is attuned to the people they work with will be able to intervene with confidence and rise above ‘choppy waters’ to rally people toward working to find solutions. A trusted leader with a presence can create the space to sort out issues through thoughtful dialogue without stepping in to control the situation. This is when people can listen to one another and create meaning together. This more positive orientation invigorates the people they are working with, and together, they can work to tackle the challenges facing them. Having gone through such an experience, stronger bonds connect people.


Inspiring people and teams


To what extent…

1.         … do I consistently show up in a way that instills commitment in others?

2.         … do I recognize and help others when they experience difficulties?

3.         … can I distinguish between what needs my attention and what doesn’t?

4.         … do I constructively follow through on commitments that have not been met?

5.         … do I strive to be at my best and inspire others to do so?

6.         … do people openly bring up my blind spots?

7.         … do I remain grounded when being challenged unexpectedly?

8.         … do I live my values, beliefs and principles in my interactions with others?

9.         … are people well aware of my values, beliefs and principles?

10.   … can people I work with predict where I will stand on emerging issues?

11.   … do people readily seek my advice?

12.   … do I react skillfully when people disagree with intense emotions?

13.   … do I inspire others to self-initiate taking purposeful action?

14.   … do I create accountability with people?


A leader's level of presence can be transformative for their organization. People can experience the energy it creates. Presence comes mainly from a sense of purpose you have defined when exercising leadership.  You have to be conscious of articulating this overall purpose to give your leadership strength, integrity and consistency. This is where you can draw energy from when you encounter challenges. As you reflect on this over some time, it will gradually take shape in your mind. Once you have clarified your purpose as a leader and keep it at the forefront of your awareness, having a consistent presence with people around you will be easier. Making challenging decisions becomes more manageable. You become less reactive when issues arise. Your voice is strong and brings energy. People will readily perceive the consistency you bring to your interactions.


Leaders who apply themselves to engaging and inspiring people invest in cultivating a positive work environment. In such an environment, team members are more likely to thrive and be vested in the organization's success. Leaders who understand that people want to be part of something they can be proud of consciously strive to be at their best to inspire others.


To set the tone, leaders should start building a narrative that courageously expresses what they believe in a down-to-earth, straightforward manner. Developing a powerful narrative demands that you, the leader, take a stand on what you believe in, what you are about, and what impact you hope to create as you form teams and build communities.


It is vital to be clear and direct in describing the underlying beliefs and values that drive this narrative. They explain the reasons for the point of view you share and the ‘why’ of the stands you are taking. They spend time understanding where people are coming from. They engage people by involving them in testing this initial narrative by asking for ideas, listening and building on what team members bring forward. Including team members’ ideas ensures shared ownership and reinforces a sense of community.  It creates mutual accountability and inspires action toward an agreed-upon larger purpose.  Once leaders have led such an exercise, it improves their confidence in speaking of what drives their leadership with clarity and confidence in a way that connects meaningfully with team members. As the created vision is discussed,  it is kept alive by embedding new learnings. To quote David Ulrich, “… the lasting impact of leadership is crafting an inspiring vision of the future and building a pathway to that vision”.   


When leaders create a collective sense of purpose, they inspire and uplift the people around them. Leaders can then exercise leadership without having to control. A self-centred leader cannot come close to realizing such an achievement, as it truly embodies leadership presence.


Having the courage to act


To what extent…

1.         … do I find ways to work to find mutually acceptable solutions in polarized situations?

2.         … do I quickly make balanced decisions?  

3.         … do I bring my authentic self to work and to each situation?

4.         … do I have a good grasp of my emotions and manage them effectively?

5.         … do I maintain composure and make rational decisions under pressure?

6.         …do I consider my values when dealing with others?

7.         … do I ensure people around me understand my leadership values/principles?

8.         … do I read how people react when I exchange with them?

9.         … do I foresee how my words and actions will impact others?

10.   … do I show respect to others when disagreeing with them?

11.   … do I feel at ease working through a difficult situation with people?

12.   … do I set goals and criteria for how I will interact with others and review them regularly?

13.   … do I feel energized when working through a difficult situation with people?

 

Unresolved issues represent a worthwhile challenge to test the presence of leaders. Given the complexity and sensitivity often related to these issues, presence is essential to rally people to their resolution. Dealing with difficult issues involves potential discomfort because of the changes their resolution usually requires. Some of the people involved may find it difficult to accept the changes. There is no obvious way to get around them. This explains why these issues often hang in a bin of unresolved issues over the organization, hampering its effectiveness. People learn that it is best to ignore them as they are seen collectively as the organizational equivalent of quicksand. Leaders avoid dealing with complex issues at their peril: they become self-imposed  ‘black holes’ draining commitment and energy. Emotional courage is required to cut through the web of implications surrounding these sticky problems.


When situations develop in the organization that contradict your values, it is essential to address them decidedly but constructively with the self-awareness needed to respect those involved. People may have a different view, but it is necessary to voice your point of view and what would make the correction acceptable. While remaining open to other points of view, it is necessary to ask questions and place tension where required to preserve your integrity and that of the organization.


Present leaders have the emotional courage to tackle complex issues/situations because they have acquired the confidence and discipline to speak and consistently act skillfully with deep respect for others. The confidence that they are anchored to solid leadership beliefs and values gives them the courage to intervene when something they experience does not correspond to their values. On the other hand, leaders often hesitate to get involved in challenging situations because they are not confident that they will remain calm and open. They are afraid of expressing their frustrations and anger and be seen to lose it at significant personal costs. Experienced leaders are conscious of preserving relationships wherever possible.


A great leader must be willing and able to display the courage it sometimes takes to stand by well-founded convictions and take a stand on an unpopular decision. A leader with presence has a solid, confident demeanour that is not easily shaken.  Presence ultimately boils down to the ability to project mature self-confidence, a sense that you can take control of complex, unpredictable situations, make tough decisions promptly and hold your own with other talented and strong-willed executive team members. The presence of a leader who is well-grounded in their values gives them the confidence to take risks that others are scared to take, such as having hard conversations, creating accountability, and inspiring action.  This is the strength of leadership that can shift the culture of a team or an organization.  These are risks well worth taking. Acting boldly can deliver an important message. If it has not been possible to make headways on an issue, the best way might be to act boldly to pierce through the fog to come across with a strategic solution that people could not see otherwise.


The ability to engender and preserve trust in difficult times is a precondition for presence. These leaders can keep influence conduits open during crises and may expand them. Most people hate uncertainty but tolerate it much better when they can look to a leader who they believe has their back and is calm, clearheaded, and courageous. These are the people we listen to and trust.


Especially when facing a high-pressure situation, it is helpful for leaders to go through a brief warm-up routine beforehand to get in the right state of mind, practicing and adopting an attitude that will help them project positive nonverbal signals. This “inside-out” approach contrasts the “outside-in” strategy of consciously trying to improvise nonverbal behaviours. Leadership from the inside out is about exercising leadership aligned with our beliefs, values, and commitments. A self-aware inside-out approach supports ‘present’ leaders with an unrushed, straightforward, and unflappable approach that helps them remain calm when others get emotional.


The full benefits of being present are realized when you approach discussions calmly, flexibly and openly. Even when you disagree, work with people, build on their ideas, and find a way to reconcile both viewpoints. Emotional courage isn't about getting what we want; it's about serving others for the organization's greater good. When you remain grounded and calm, you can choose how you experience a situation and respond; it will enable you to stay focused and ‘present’ under pressure and amid volatility without being swept away by your instinctive reactions.


Being empathetic and vulnerable


To what extent…

1.         … do I readily change my assumptions and beliefs when they prove wrong?

2.         … do I engage in self-reflection to learn from past experiences?

3.         … do I admit mistakes openly and readily correct them?

4.         … feel comfortable showing vulnerability when having made a mistake?

5.         … willing to change my convictions based on what others tell me?

6.         … invest in relationships whether or not they work out?

7.         … do I treat myself with the compassion I need to remain self-confident?

8.         … do I balance empathy/vulnerability and drive to optimize performance?

… do I feel accepted and connected with people around me?  


In a recent discussion, an experienced professional in the field of leadership expressed a strongly felt point of view, asserting that a leader's empathy and vulnerability were incompatible with a drive for performance. This opinion reflects the beliefs of many leaders who often struggle to balance empathy with focusing on achieving results because the former weakens the latter.  However, there is some evidence that exceptional leadership resides in mastering both.  A recent study by Joe Folkman at Zenger Folkman (based on a sample of 4,000 leaders) reported that 89% of leaders who were strong at both drive and empathy were ranked in the top quartile of overall leadership performance, while only 10% were in that quartile if they were extraordinarily good at driving performance but not at empathy.  We can better understand this disparity by diving more deeply into the dynamics between the behaviours of ‘present’ leaders with empathy and vulnerability and their impact on performance.


To ensure clarity as we explore this topic, let’s first define empathy and vulnerability. Empathy is a state of mind about how to interact with people. Empathy starts with being interested in finding out how people are doing.  This curiosity enables us to connect with people at a meaningful level. We suspend judgment to listen to people. Leaders with ‘presence’ make an effort to learn about people around them and suspend their natural propensity to judge and genuinely listen to them. Leading with empathy naturally leads to asking employees for their perspectives and makes people feel heard and valued. When they experience this with a leader, people feel accepted for who they are, and deeper connections are created. Their engagement is also more robust.  


The receiver sees the genuine expression of empathy as ‘benevolence,’ which research recognizes as a precursor to trust. In a parallel way, self-compassion is conducive to confidence. Both trust and confidence lead to the exercise of more meaningful, more effective leadership. The leader with ‘presence’ listens and interacts authentically. People become more confident, positive and productive with deeper connections. Leaders have a better sense of what is happening in the organization and can more readily intervene when performance issues emerge. By integrating empathy into leadership practices, leaders can create a supportive environment that encourages high performance and fosters a strong, cohesive team.


Vulnerability is about showing openness and willingness to learn from mistakes or failures. Being vulnerable means recognizing that we don’t always do things right and make mistakes without feeling defensive. Empathy and vulnerability are often grouped, but they are pretty different: the former has an internal focus, and the latter has an external focus. While vulnerability is from the perspective of looking at ourselves, empathy is oriented to connecting genuinely at an emotional level with people. As underlined earlier in this paper, leadership generates a constant energy flow from the interaction in the dynamic loop between these two dimensions.


Their practice accedes to a whole new level of effectiveness when leaders embed empathy and vulnerability into their practice.


Conclusion

The capability of being present as a leader is critical. Leaders who build presence as part of their leadership practice create a positive work environment, build strong connections with people around them, convey a sense of purpose, instill trust and inspire commitment. They are attentive to people and demonstrably care for their development and success. They speak in a way that uplifts their self-esteem and confidence. They affirm their leadership goals, values and principles. And consistently live by them.  They show discipline and keep their ego in check. Self-awareness allows them to sustain a grounded, stable presence in challenging times. They have the emotional courage to tackle complex issues and lead necessary change.   


People can see through leaders who make these claims if they perceive inconsistencies. To achieve all this, leaders can’t hide behind any mask; they must be authentic and transparent. Awareness and substance are essential.

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